The statement: ‘love is not the foundation for marriage’ may cause problems. I know it will.
Because, we normally get married to someone because we say ‘we are in love’. Can I suggest to you please after being married for 32 years myself and a very happy marriage. Not a bad day for 32 years!
Can I say to you that, love does not make marriage work. Don’t be fooled by that whether it’s a feeling that you say you have for someone or an endearment to someone (someone tells you good things). Don’t get married because you love someone! I love aircraft but I can’t fly them. You can love something but you don’t know how to do it. So, it isn’t the love that is the problem. It’s knowledge to function in there.
Love does not keep marriage together. And I believe every divorced person will agree with this statement. If you are divorced today, that means you were once in love with the person. So, you didn’t lack love, there was some other things that came up in the relationship that were stronger or powerful than the love. Whether it was infidelity, unfaithfulness, abuse (physical or emotional or mental), neglect, or irresponsibility in finances. Something came up that became more powerful than the love you have for the person. Which means that, love can’t save you.
You can be in love as a young man, but it does not make the woman the right woman. You can express your passion to this man, but that love you have for that man won’t make him the right man for you.
So get wisdom and in all thy getting, don’t get love, get understanding.” You want to understand what it is to be a woman, what it is to be a man, how to live with a human. You want to understand the innocent Christian use of a female and unique need of a male. You want to understand communication skills, you want to understand how to manage emotions and how to manage anger. You want to understand the dynamics of disagreements. You want to understand how to handle unfaithfulness or broken trust. You want to understand because if you don’t understand those things, you are going to dumb the marriage.
Many marriages today could have been saved today, but the individuals didn’t have the equipment. The knowledge to use to fix the situation. No marriage is irreparable! But, most people don’t know or they are just so tired trying and they quit. I believe it, troubles can make you tired. And this is why it is important for you to get understanding.
Hosea 4:6 “my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.” Here is the part people always miss, because you have rejected knowledge, I will also reject you says the Lord.
God is saying that ignorance is a choice. You cannot reject something that is not available. I’m human too, I know you sit there and get tired of me saying, ‘Go buy this book’ and you sit there, you have hell at home and walk passed the book store. Do you know that all your problem that you facing now are probably solved in a book in your house you haven’t read? We reject knowledge! Have you ever been in a session and you hear the teaching and your first thought is: boy, he should have been here! Oh, they should have been here to hear this! What you are saying is, they missed it! They rejected opportunity to get knowledge. God said: “because you reject knowledge, I will also reject you.” Because, I cannot help you with what you don’t know. And He said, ‘you cannot be a priest before me.’ The word priest means representative. God is saying, ‘I don’t want you to represent me if you are stupid’. I don’t want you to go tell people you know me and you don’t. Stop saying praise the Lord and you can’t handle your life. You have not gotten the material to represent me and you are telling everybody you know me?
He said: ‘don’t tell anybody about me. Please! Because you are messing up my reputation.’ And here is the worst part, it ends with this: ’and I will also reject your children.’
What you don’t know is transferred to your kids! So, if you cannot stay married and get it right, you better be careful because your kids may also be endangered of having the same problem that you have.
‘Learn for your unborn children’, read a book for your unborn children, go to a seminar for your unborn children, because that is what it is about.
The less you know the less your children can learn; the more you learn the more you can teach them.
Because, when you have information you can transfer them to your children. God says: you need to get understanding and knowledge.
Dr Myles Monroe
